Remembering your beginnings

So recently I had a friend over for our monthly I do laundry while she catches me up on her life. This is probably one of my favorite times to have because she is a no shit taker animated story teller. She was one of the people I met at the beginning of this crazy fun life I am living now. Of course we always start out by saying we have an hour or two of time to spend gabbing, but it never fails that we spend like six hours talking about everything under the sun. After catching up on normal life we began talking about our burlesque experiences and how some peoples attitudes change very quickly.

Now we are still a growing community that is going through growing pains since burlesque is just now getting stronger and stronger. Now the one thing my girlfriend is starting to see is that some people we now know have changed from the simple beginner performer into a person who believes they are now at a higher level than us because they have been performing now in a few shows. Even those who have been performing for a year seem to think that it's beneath them to hang with us noobs. 

Since I have started I have gotten to know a lot of people in the community, but still love the fresh blood that joins our growing group. I'm not saying this to sound better or worse I'm just a gabber and a supporter of all who love this art form. My friend was saying how people need to remember their beginnings and stay humble. I agree 100% because staying humble is the key. When you start seeming as if you aren't a part of a family but the ones who deserve to be above everyone else you begin to lose a following I think. I feel if I started acting like I was better than everyone else I would lose the support of those I adore. And in all reality why act this way. I am always told how friendly and open the world community of burlesque is and it should be that way in the smaller local communities as well. This only stays this way if we remember where we started and stay humble. 

I just found it interesting when a friend sits and tells how they are feeling about others in the community. And sometimes you only keep your compass pointing in the right direction by making sure you surround yourself by those who remind you to be humble.

I told you my wheels are always turning...

A way to avoid shitty ass bullshit

So after seeing people I have been around get super mad and almost want to fight about performer's possible steal of others material I have decided to be courteous and respectful to all those in the art form. So people don't want to work as hard as others and for some reason choose to show a lack of respect for fellow performers. It happens everywhere, shit go watch show girls and see how bitchy people can get over some kind of fame. It is inevitable most of the time and you can either choose to do well choreographed dance fighting over, throw drinks, or be a person who helps change the way things are done.

Let me put this out there I am a no body. I have one number and have been in two group numbers. that's it, but I have ambitions and want to do so much more. Since the act of cat fighting is out of the question for me, I'm more of a boob lover, and the fact that I am not in this to steal fame from anyone I wanted to go about doing things differently.

There are two songs that call to me and say be dirty and get naked every time I hear them.  One is the epic song Red Right Hand and the other I won't name because I have a special surprise for when that one is unveiled. But they both make me filled with glee and want to get naked when ever I hear them. So the steps I have taken thus far to ensure that I am not a person going with their heart and being damned for it later.

1. Listened to the songs over and over to ensure that they are truly songs I want to perform to.
2. Got on good ol' Google and researched the songs with the word burlesque attached to them.
3. Found others who performed to the same song.
4. Got on YouTube to see if what I had in mind was anything like theirs. Luckily for me my ideas are very different.
5. Went a looking for these lovelies on the Facebook.
6. Friend requested or like their pages
7. Sent them personal messages asking them their thoughts about me using a song they have performed to. One of these lovely ladies actually one in a BHOF competition once so I would not like to get cut over a fan of hers being angry at me over it.

This took me a whole 30 minutes of time to do. I haven't heard anything back yet but really people this shouldn't be that hard for anyone else to do. Why ride the feather tails of another burlesques performer when we all have our own talent to showcase. I have seen some crazy shit over the last several months and not a single person has a reason to want to steal something from another.

I may be a mama who bitches, curses, drinks, and is a booby molester but I was raised with some kind of manners that I haven't thrown to the wind.

When I hear from these lovely women I'll let everyone know what they say. Let's hope my point comes through with their responses.

Wheels always turning

It's funny how when looking or seeing or even listening to things is different when you start going down the path of becoming a serious burlesque performer. I see certain materials or outfits and I wonder how those could become something much more than what they are. You see a normal dance performance and you wonder how you could do a strip version of the awesome you just saw. Better yet every single song I hear now becomes some version of me stripping in my head. The other thing that has changed for me is how involved my family life is getting into this. At first it was just me with the support of a few family members, which was big and scary all at the same time. Now I am hoping to make it a family affair where I can't wait for the time I can do a duet with my hubs. And my son isn't a little guy that no one knows. He is everywhere with me and most of the community out here knows who he is and he knows them as well. Along with family there are a rare few who are slowly becoming my family and I fucking love it.

The other thing that I have constant struggles with are do it for the art only or be a professional about it. In our city there aren't a ton of shows with great stages and mind blowing venues. Most of these ladies are pulling the money out of their pockets and not always are they making anything off of what they are doing so we perform where we are welcome. I think I have potential to be a good performer, but I feel as of right now that I am no where near that level. I feel like in a year or so after I have successfully been in more that the Las Vegas Burlesque festival it could be a possibility. I would like to be recognized by other pretty well known performers in this country not just here at home. I have a long way though before I can even think of that. But the thought has crossed my mind, "Do I have what it takes?" is a constant in this little head of mine.


Wheels turning turning turning...

Women

Can I just start with saying that at times I believe I have a small penis hiding somewhere on me because I have never particularly gotten along with most women. my old saying used to be I either hated you or wanted to fuck you and that was all. It isn't the most true saying anymore. Since joining burlesque I have started enjoying the company of women just as friends again. I have found the people who get my sick sense of humor, understand that I will do anything for a person as long as you are there for me, let me grab their boobs all day long and don't take offense. I had started this whole blurb off realizing that I wasn't doing what I wanted to say justice so here I am starting it all over.

I have almost always had dude friends cause women have always just found a way to piss the fuck off. "How can I say this when I am a woman myself "you say? Well I have always tried to make sure that I didn't react in the ways I have seen so many women react in hard situations and I honestly think like a guy in many perspectives. I love beer, I talk dirty all the freaking time, and I don't do what I would consider overly girlie things, not until recently of course. So as you can see me and girls in the past haven't mixed well. It's not that their isn't a single woman in the world that has traits like me I just haven't met many in my life.

When starting burlesque while taking the intensive I spoke about this jokingly and told them that I was happy to announce that I didn't feel either way about the girls I was with, It felt great to know I could actually stand the women I was with weekly and actually want to hang out with them outside of the class as well. These women were similar to me but way more girlie. It was nice being surrounded by women who got my humor, saw my genuine side and didn't take advantage of it, and luckily for me let me grab their boobs all day long. 

Since class I have found more women who take things as seriously as I do when it comes to getting shit done and I enjoy talking to outside of burlesque. It's nice to see that I still have a fighting chance to be surrounded by women and feel at home in their presence. I know this may be weird for many to hear but it's true in the past women weirded me out though I never had problems conversing with them in a group setting. So yay for finding chics who I dig in a nonsexual sexual way ;)

Just the random shit that goes through my head

Crazy week try just fucking crazy!!!!

Life isn't getting slower it is speeding up though I have been trying to slow it down. It is a hard balance to try and keep and right now I am failing at keeping that balance without falling into a huge batch of glitter and dying in it.

So things that are making it hard for me to keep the balance
1. Keeping up with my beautiful home, no lie my house is huge (I hate even saying this) so taking care of it on my own isn't easy.
2. Two toddler boys who insist in trying to climb out the damn dog door like prisoners.
3. Wanting to see every damn show there is monthly in this town
4. Rehearsing to be an awesome tubby reindeer.
5. Starting rehearsals for a group can can number \
6. Keeping up with a blog I love writing on.
7. Being a loving and supporting partner to Mr. Badcock.
8. Remembering myself at the end of the day.
9. Next years festival
10. A new number for myself

All these things I love doing and being a part of. I just tend to run into one direction leaving all else behind and creating mad chaos for all around me. this sort of behavior is a hard one to manage and I really need to try and figure this damn shit out. So for now I have stopped going to every show there is though I feel like I am missing out on all the fun no matter what. My reindeer gig is almost to its performance so after that it is in the past. Can Can isn't too hard since we are very organized with dealing with it, for now. My kids may just end up in Velcro suits at some point and on a Velcro wall I will gladly put up in my house myself, Just kidding for those who feel the need to call CPS. And as for the me and Mr. Badcock we are trying to figure out how to make it all work and not have me downing a bottle of wine a night, that shit could be going toward costume shit and more eyelashes damn it!!

So here I am trying to show the world what it is like to be a mom who likes taking her clothes off. Hah in this town it isn't that big of a deal but I am sure everywhere else being a performer who likes to get naked and still be a good mom is probably just a crock of shit, but guess what here I am bitches.

So life is hell on wheels and my chaos is brought on by yours truly who just loves being crazy all the time. And I think I want to write more about that on this blog. Being a mom during the day and a glittery doused vixen at night!!! It could be a good super hero for a comic strip, just sayin.

Anyway, I haven't forgotten about this wonderful blog and will try and write more about the crazy glittery life I lead more often.

Las Vegas Burlesque Festival and my experince

Hey look it is a post I meant to post weeks ago....sorry everyone have fun reading.


Let me just say that it was a great weekend and the performers were fantastic every last one of them. This whole post is about my personal experience. I was not only a performer but a volunteer and I was on the "A-Team". 

I learned the hard way that it wasn't the best thing for me to be doing so much that weekend. I performed on the second night which was on the Plaza Stage in their showroom. That my friends was such a treat. The stage makes you feel like a start even if you are a noob like me. It isn't a huge stage, but for me honestly I was so damn happy for it. I have stumpy legs and hauling ass on stage would have looked ridiculous for me. I also had my mom, Mr.Badcock, and my Amazon there to support me. Along with all the other fabulous friends I have in the Vegas community. The dressing rooms were small but it just meant closer to all the lovely ladies and the one gent we had in my room. OH!!!!! I forgot to say I was in the same room with Red Snapper and Mr. Snapper along with Lili VonSchtupp!!! these are people I look up to. They have been doing this for a long time and handle them selves so well all the freaking time. I did get great advice from Lili about introductions and what the first impression is of my name and what someone might be expecting. I introduced myself to Red Snapper and pointed out that I was the girl who posted on her blog and thanked her in person.  Can I just say with the amount of fabulous people that were there I only spoke to like 15 of them. What the Hell is wrong with me????? So many great women that I could be listening to and learning from and I stood around like a dope. Oh well lesson learned on that one don't be shy jump in and talk.

As a Volunteer I did a lot people!! Well I was supposed to do a lot. I housed a great performer Holly Dai from Portland Oregon. She in my opinion is like the Cha Cha Velour of Portland she was there performing before there was really a community and started the classes and everything. She was the sweetest person and taught me a few things while she was here too. I had her for four days and by the end it felt like she lived here :) I also drove people from place to place during the weekend also. I was able to get us beverages for the brunch so I dropped those off as well after the show Friday night around 2:30 am, I was super tired.  I was supposed to be a procession person and drive more people to the bazaar on Sunday, but I had a bunch of personal emotional things pop up during the weekend that caused me not to do the last two. As for all of the volunteering I did I shouldn't have taken on so much because I was also doing all of this while trying to figure out my toddler boys at the same time. I got way over stressed and acted like a douche to those that I am closest too. My husband was the worst one to get it and I shouldn't have done that to him :(  Luckily he didn't give up on me during the whole thing. So my lesson learned from this whole part is to not allow myself to take on so much because I don't handle myself very well.

Being a part of the "A-team" has been such a learning experience into what happens in the background at an event like this. I will never look at them the same way again. People don't know how much work goes into these types of events until they get to be a part of one. I have mad respect for any of the people who put on a burlesque festival cause this shit ain't easy!!

Now as for my opinions about a few things that happened during the weekend.

1. Negativity is seen by everyone. If you tromp around like the world is kicking you everyone notices and that shit spreads fast!!
2. Most people do not have original acts. It was something I was told during my class right off the bat and it is in Joe Boobs book. Someone somewhere has done something just like you are doing. So with that being said calm down about it. You are probably not the only one with that idea. Just be respectful about it and put it out there so no one can get cranky. Also if you are the person getting upset it is never okay to bash and be rude about it. Also don't think about going to the performer and "confronting" them when you are angry you never show a person what you mean.
3. One thing all people need to remember when in Vegas smoke is everywhere!!!! You will never get away from it so please don't get upset that it is in a venue where smoking happens. We are sin city so that isn't ever going anywhere.
4. Have fun for gods sakes this is a great event to just hang out meet new people and learn. No need to be mean in any way.