Women

Can I just start with saying that at times I believe I have a small penis hiding somewhere on me because I have never particularly gotten along with most women. my old saying used to be I either hated you or wanted to fuck you and that was all. It isn't the most true saying anymore. Since joining burlesque I have started enjoying the company of women just as friends again. I have found the people who get my sick sense of humor, understand that I will do anything for a person as long as you are there for me, let me grab their boobs all day long and don't take offense. I had started this whole blurb off realizing that I wasn't doing what I wanted to say justice so here I am starting it all over.

I have almost always had dude friends cause women have always just found a way to piss the fuck off. "How can I say this when I am a woman myself "you say? Well I have always tried to make sure that I didn't react in the ways I have seen so many women react in hard situations and I honestly think like a guy in many perspectives. I love beer, I talk dirty all the freaking time, and I don't do what I would consider overly girlie things, not until recently of course. So as you can see me and girls in the past haven't mixed well. It's not that their isn't a single woman in the world that has traits like me I just haven't met many in my life.

When starting burlesque while taking the intensive I spoke about this jokingly and told them that I was happy to announce that I didn't feel either way about the girls I was with, It felt great to know I could actually stand the women I was with weekly and actually want to hang out with them outside of the class as well. These women were similar to me but way more girlie. It was nice being surrounded by women who got my humor, saw my genuine side and didn't take advantage of it, and luckily for me let me grab their boobs all day long. 

Since class I have found more women who take things as seriously as I do when it comes to getting shit done and I enjoy talking to outside of burlesque. It's nice to see that I still have a fighting chance to be surrounded by women and feel at home in their presence. I know this may be weird for many to hear but it's true in the past women weirded me out though I never had problems conversing with them in a group setting. So yay for finding chics who I dig in a nonsexual sexual way ;)

Just the random shit that goes through my head

Crazy week try just fucking crazy!!!!

Life isn't getting slower it is speeding up though I have been trying to slow it down. It is a hard balance to try and keep and right now I am failing at keeping that balance without falling into a huge batch of glitter and dying in it.

So things that are making it hard for me to keep the balance
1. Keeping up with my beautiful home, no lie my house is huge (I hate even saying this) so taking care of it on my own isn't easy.
2. Two toddler boys who insist in trying to climb out the damn dog door like prisoners.
3. Wanting to see every damn show there is monthly in this town
4. Rehearsing to be an awesome tubby reindeer.
5. Starting rehearsals for a group can can number \
6. Keeping up with a blog I love writing on.
7. Being a loving and supporting partner to Mr. Badcock.
8. Remembering myself at the end of the day.
9. Next years festival
10. A new number for myself

All these things I love doing and being a part of. I just tend to run into one direction leaving all else behind and creating mad chaos for all around me. this sort of behavior is a hard one to manage and I really need to try and figure this damn shit out. So for now I have stopped going to every show there is though I feel like I am missing out on all the fun no matter what. My reindeer gig is almost to its performance so after that it is in the past. Can Can isn't too hard since we are very organized with dealing with it, for now. My kids may just end up in Velcro suits at some point and on a Velcro wall I will gladly put up in my house myself, Just kidding for those who feel the need to call CPS. And as for the me and Mr. Badcock we are trying to figure out how to make it all work and not have me downing a bottle of wine a night, that shit could be going toward costume shit and more eyelashes damn it!!

So here I am trying to show the world what it is like to be a mom who likes taking her clothes off. Hah in this town it isn't that big of a deal but I am sure everywhere else being a performer who likes to get naked and still be a good mom is probably just a crock of shit, but guess what here I am bitches.

So life is hell on wheels and my chaos is brought on by yours truly who just loves being crazy all the time. And I think I want to write more about that on this blog. Being a mom during the day and a glittery doused vixen at night!!! It could be a good super hero for a comic strip, just sayin.

Anyway, I haven't forgotten about this wonderful blog and will try and write more about the crazy glittery life I lead more often.

Las Vegas Burlesque Festival and my experince

Hey look it is a post I meant to post weeks ago....sorry everyone have fun reading.


Let me just say that it was a great weekend and the performers were fantastic every last one of them. This whole post is about my personal experience. I was not only a performer but a volunteer and I was on the "A-Team". 

I learned the hard way that it wasn't the best thing for me to be doing so much that weekend. I performed on the second night which was on the Plaza Stage in their showroom. That my friends was such a treat. The stage makes you feel like a start even if you are a noob like me. It isn't a huge stage, but for me honestly I was so damn happy for it. I have stumpy legs and hauling ass on stage would have looked ridiculous for me. I also had my mom, Mr.Badcock, and my Amazon there to support me. Along with all the other fabulous friends I have in the Vegas community. The dressing rooms were small but it just meant closer to all the lovely ladies and the one gent we had in my room. OH!!!!! I forgot to say I was in the same room with Red Snapper and Mr. Snapper along with Lili VonSchtupp!!! these are people I look up to. They have been doing this for a long time and handle them selves so well all the freaking time. I did get great advice from Lili about introductions and what the first impression is of my name and what someone might be expecting. I introduced myself to Red Snapper and pointed out that I was the girl who posted on her blog and thanked her in person.  Can I just say with the amount of fabulous people that were there I only spoke to like 15 of them. What the Hell is wrong with me????? So many great women that I could be listening to and learning from and I stood around like a dope. Oh well lesson learned on that one don't be shy jump in and talk.

As a Volunteer I did a lot people!! Well I was supposed to do a lot. I housed a great performer Holly Dai from Portland Oregon. She in my opinion is like the Cha Cha Velour of Portland she was there performing before there was really a community and started the classes and everything. She was the sweetest person and taught me a few things while she was here too. I had her for four days and by the end it felt like she lived here :) I also drove people from place to place during the weekend also. I was able to get us beverages for the brunch so I dropped those off as well after the show Friday night around 2:30 am, I was super tired.  I was supposed to be a procession person and drive more people to the bazaar on Sunday, but I had a bunch of personal emotional things pop up during the weekend that caused me not to do the last two. As for all of the volunteering I did I shouldn't have taken on so much because I was also doing all of this while trying to figure out my toddler boys at the same time. I got way over stressed and acted like a douche to those that I am closest too. My husband was the worst one to get it and I shouldn't have done that to him :(  Luckily he didn't give up on me during the whole thing. So my lesson learned from this whole part is to not allow myself to take on so much because I don't handle myself very well.

Being a part of the "A-team" has been such a learning experience into what happens in the background at an event like this. I will never look at them the same way again. People don't know how much work goes into these types of events until they get to be a part of one. I have mad respect for any of the people who put on a burlesque festival cause this shit ain't easy!!

Now as for my opinions about a few things that happened during the weekend.

1. Negativity is seen by everyone. If you tromp around like the world is kicking you everyone notices and that shit spreads fast!!
2. Most people do not have original acts. It was something I was told during my class right off the bat and it is in Joe Boobs book. Someone somewhere has done something just like you are doing. So with that being said calm down about it. You are probably not the only one with that idea. Just be respectful about it and put it out there so no one can get cranky. Also if you are the person getting upset it is never okay to bash and be rude about it. Also don't think about going to the performer and "confronting" them when you are angry you never show a person what you mean.
3. One thing all people need to remember when in Vegas smoke is everywhere!!!! You will never get away from it so please don't get upset that it is in a venue where smoking happens. We are sin city so that isn't ever going anywhere.
4. Have fun for gods sakes this is a great event to just hang out meet new people and learn. No need to be mean in any way.

Too Hot To Handle

So at the end of every moth there is an awesome show called Live Burlesque in Las Vegas. It's held in a small venue inside a bar called Boomers. I have gone to many of the shows and have had a blast every time I have been in the audience. Well I was lucky enough to perform in the September show Too Hot To Handle.

I was told by a friend that it was going to be amazing on the stage due to the energy in the room. Let me just say how right that person was. Just think you are in a room filled with burlesque enthusiasts. These people need no lesson on etiquette at all, I should know I am usually sitting out their with them.  The people in the audience played back with me as I performed and I I got tot grace the stage with some awesome performers.

So here are the great photos that were taken of me. The photographer is MHA photography. She does a ton of the events in the community so go onto facebook and check her out!!

Working on a festival

So this year marks the first ever Las Vegas Burlesque Festival. Yes our city hosts BHOF (Burlesque Hall of Fame Weekend) but our festival isn't anywhere near like BHOF is. And because of this we also didn't want to be in competition with this amazing weekend either. Honestly all of us want to be there so why would we want to start a burly rumble with them. Since this is the festivals first year they needed a lot of help getting things done. Honestly when they were first starting I had no idea how I could help so I didn't initially volunteer, but thanks to my dear friend Kiki, we make lots of trouble together, I became part of the festival just two months ago.

What goes into a festival is crazy!!!!! I had no idea how much work it was going to be and didn't care either, because I was able to help. I became a sponsorship person for the festival since they needed the help and I am a helper. Now only being two months away from the festival this job is harder than I think it would have been if I had started a few months back, but I have done everything in my power to gain us assistance in any way I could. I was able to get us some assistance, but not as much as I think I can next year.

Now all the crazy that goes into a festival is bonkers. Luckily for us we have a fearless leader she has a vision and wanted to stop at nothing to make it a reality. And so far we are making it a great reality. We have three days for performances, which I am in one of those nights, starting at our local place the Boom Boom room inside Boomers bar and than we head downtown to The Plaza showroom for the other two nights. We have performers coming from all over the place including other countries. To be a part of it all three nights is ridiculously exciting. We even have a day where we are having a party at Du Barry's store. Now if you don't know Du Barry's you should damn it!!! Du Barry's has great dresses and jewelry. I bought a dress from their after seeing all the fabulousness at BHOF the one night I went. Their dresses aren't for the normal crowd. I am talking beads galore and jewelry that would make your glammed out grandma proud. AHHHHH...I love this place. Anyways, we are even having a bazaar that Sunday and Thursday night where you will see tons of amazing glittery things to purchase. How exciting is this gonna be!?!?!?!?

So I got a little side tracked with explaining the hard parts behind the scenes. Can I just say Money! Money is always the huge factor with all of this. We have gained a few thousand from our generous donations that our community here in Las Vegas. But we have had to deal with absorbing most of the upfront cost, which is something I am hoping to solve next year. A lot of our money comes from tickets sales, and we are doing amazing with those!!!!! I am hoping we have a packed house the whole weekend showing everyone that locals are loved too. Now many other festivals hold competitions and we made the choice not to do that, but to just celebrate the amazing art that we bring. Housing performers and getting them around is a whole other thing as well. I am looking forward to being a tittie taxi that weekend (I'm even painting my car for it) so that many of the ladies and gents that will be at the hotel will have rides to the other events that we have going on. We are even offering a brunch to the performers. That was a whole other thing that had minor complications to it, but we solved those as well. It's crazy how much work gets put into all of this before it even happens.

Then end product I honestly can't wait to share with all of you after it's over. The people I have gotten involved with are allowing me to really see what this community is all about. It's amazing to see that so many will band together for a weekend of good times for all. I'm so freaking excited for this event to fucking happen I might pee a little when I wake up next Thursday morning knowing that it is the beginning for the weekend.

Negative opinions

Now I will state this if you think differently than I do that is fine. We all have the right to our opinion, but lately I have been reading articles about how degrading burlesque performing is to women and that we are still kneeling to a patriarchal society. But take a moment and think about what legends have done and during the time they did it. They worked their asses off and most of them had children to care for as well. They did what needed to be done and beyond that as well. They showed women that it didn't matter what we did, because whatever it was we could prove to the world that we will do it our own way. They have given many women the strength to stand up and say we love ourselves. If you think about it a patriarchal society is not about us loving ourselves and being happy in our own skin. It is about loving what a man thinks and what he says is okay.  Granted I am glad my hubs likes his chubby bunny it's an added bonus ;)

But if you sat with any of the women and men who perform now our stories start off very similar. We didn't love ourselves when starting our classes for one reason or another. Either it was physical appearance or emotional turmoil something that kept us from loving ourselves was happening. Now through our own journeys we began to see ourselves in a different light. We started looking in the mirror when we were naked and saying hey this isn't so bad. For me personally I had had a baby boy who left his journey across my lower body and that can't be changed. I love my son to the point of pissing him off when I ask him for a kiss because I do it so often. But it didn't leave my self esteem in tact. I cried thinking my husband didn't find me attractive anymore and the fact was I didn't find myself attractive at the time.

Burlesque was an eye opener for me. It reminded me that I should love me I earned every mark I have. Some showed me that I could over come my own demons, others reminded me that I was given a miracle, and the rest reminded that I gained them through truly finding happiness in my life. So why not be ecstatic about finding an art form that allows me to do two things I love, dance and being naked. Yes I love being naked...I get made fun of for it all the time by my hubs. I grew up dancing in a world where I was too big and short, which caused me to have years of eating disorders and many suicidal moments thinking I was never going to be good enough. Now I get to dance and have fun doing it in my own skin that I earned.

So when bashing us performers for the art we bring to the stage I will say this...Kiss my fucking ass and all the other naked asses you have seen. If you hate this art form and laugh at me for calling it that DO NOT go to a show. Stop allowing your friends to drag you to shows and shut your damn mouth already. Also remember you are the reasons many of us got into this art in the first place. We were constantly told we weren't worthy of what we were doing just like you are trying to say. You know what our responses have been slapping glitter on us and twirling our pasties to our hearts content. We love the skin we are in now and laugh at people putting us down.

Burlesque is our courage and our way of telling the world we are finally happy.

Legends

So being in Vegas those of us in the community are surrounded by many women who started this art form and many who were and are chums with them. Now for me I find them intimidating. So far though none of them have been nothing but nice to me when I do speak to them. So far I have met Tiffany Carter, Tempest Storm (whom I love), Dusty Summers, and I was lucky enough to perform on the same stage with Gypsie Luise this past weekend.

After performing with Gypsie I told her how great she was and what an honor it was to share the stage with her. She gave me a hug!! Really I was not expecting that at all. Seeing these great women on stage still shaking their shit like no tomorrow makes me proud to be a part of it all.

None of these women came from easy lives and for any of us who now do this as a full time hobby have nothing in comparison to these ladies and their lives. If you don't know who some of these ladies are you should look them up. I am personally waiting for Dusty's book to come out and for the documentary to be done on Tempest Storm. These ladies paved the way in my opinion for women's liberation and a path for women to love them selves again.

I know it's short but I wanted to put it out there anyway.

glittery kisses to you all.